Flipping the script

One of my friends is feeling frustrated about something in her life. She is feeling this intense feeling of being stuck in a situation that she doesn't like and isn't sure how to change it.

Before we go any further, this isn't one of those stories where "My friend is" is actually code for "I am."

She wrote an email to a group of her friends that laid out all of things about this situation that frustrate her. Then she wrote another email that flipped the script, so to speak, and set out some short term (1-2 years) and long term (2-4 years) goals as well as what she ultimately wanted the situation to look like.

I was struck by how simple this re-framing was and yet how brilliant.

How often do I feel like a situation is both sucktastic and beyond my control? A lot. How often do I see how a situation can be changed and what I can do to change it? Not often.

As a related matter, in a meeting yesterday, a colleague spoke at length about "outcomes assessment" in which she discussed the concept of writing outcomes.

Outcomes, she stated, are desired changes in behavior, attitude, or skills.

The formula she presented for writing an outcome:

Verb/action phrase + "in order to" + Why = Outcome

An example:
Complete couch to 5K program in order to successfully run 3 miles.

So what do these two ideas have to do with one another?

I sometimes feel like I choose to believe that a situation is beyond my control instead of looking for ways I can change it. The next time I feel frustrated at how stuck I feel, I need to stop and consider what I want the situation to ultimately look like (using my handy-dandy outcome-writing skill) and then set short and long-term goals to get from where I am now to where I want to be.

What do you wish was different? How can you work to change it?